Brene Brown

Vulnerability in communication = finding my soul?

 

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Let’s start with a straight question today. What’s the cost of vulnerability in your professional and personal life? What’s the value?

I see three options:

  1. You get what you ask for.  Yay, cool deal!
  2. You get denied.  Hey, at least you stepped up and asked, right?
  3. You get ignored.  That’s the worst. Feeling. Ever

“Vulnerability is the only authentic state. Being vulnerable means being open, for wounding, but also for pleasure. Being open to the wounds of life means also being open to the bounty and beauty. Don’t mask or deny your vulnerability: it is your greatest asset. Be vulnerable: quake and shake in your boots with it. the new goodness that is coming to you, in the form of people, situations, and things can only come to you when you are vulnerable, i.e. open.” – Stephen Russel

I listened to a great TED Radio Hour last week titled “Maslow’s Human Needs”.  The Ted Radio Hour got me thinking about how I communicate on both a personal and professional level. Especially in Level 3 and 4, where Love/belong and Esteem reside. Which got me thinking about 98 other things…because that’s how my brain works. I also encourage you to check out Brene Brown’s TED Talk “The Power of Vulnerability”.  She’s a great story teller.

Maslow

“Vulnerability is basically uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure.” Brene Brown

Truly speaking what’s on your mind, in a positive way and having your “voice” make sense is tough. I’m getting a little better at making my voice heard. I’m just not always that good at how I present my thoughts. Why is this important to me, and to you reading this?

“Vulnerability is the birthplace of connection and the path to the feeling of worthiness. If it doesn’t feel vulnerable, the sharing is probably not constructive.” – Brene Brown

Perhaps this makes you feel a little more comfortable thinking about this topic or discussing with a SO or teammate at work, because someone else shares your concerns. We are certainly NOT along in this! Trusting someone enough to let your defenses down and speak up is not easy, but the rewards are there.

Benefits to “vulnerability”? Establishing and growing personal confidence, for one. Getting what you want?  Most likely, since if you never ask, you’ll never “get”, right? Moving forward in a relationship or in your workplace? Yes, you need to speak your thoughts clearly and confidently. Gaining respect, feeling that you’re being heard, getting that warm rush of “ahhhh….”

“As unique as we all are, an awful lot of us want the same things. We want to shake up our current less-than-fulfilling lives. We want to be happier, more loving, forgiving and connected with the people around us.” – Brene Brown

I will say that being vulnerable has pitfalls, and I’m sure we’ve all felt them.

There can always be a “no” and your idea/thoughts get shot down.  Ok, nothing ventured, nothing gained. You can always receive an enthusiastic “YES!” to your communication.  That’s a win-win for all involved!

The worst? Getting…..nothing. Crickets. Your thoughts were not even listened to, not even considered.  Swept away and ignored.  Your “voice” was ignored.  Your emotions were ignored. YOU were ignored.

That is the worst part about being vulnerable.  The silence.

Speak up anyway.  Be authentic, trust in yourself and your fellow human. You may just surprise yourself.

Be vulnerable, because as Brown states, “vulnerability is not weakness. And that myth is profoundly dangerous.”

 

 

 

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Women’s World Cup – Go United States!

We have a couple of BIG United States Women’s National Team fans here. 

Can’t wait to watch the World Cup final vs. Japan. If the U.S. defense plays the way they did against Germany, the match will be amazing to watch! 

  

 

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Uncomplicated Fish Tacos

Thanks to the kind comments over on FB about this very simple dinner of grilled tilapia for the fish tacos. Jeannine, here you go :).  By the way, if you like interior design and fabric, please check out Jeannine Petteruti Design.  She does fabulous work and has a fantastic eye.  Plus, totally cool woman with a cool sense of style and fun to work with.  Another post is coming about my experience with Jeannine and caring about fabric :)

First, I did NOT have time to get to either Wegmans or Bucks County Seafood and had to “settle” for the tilapia filets. I’m picky with my fish and get a little bummed when I can’t find other options.

I stuck the fish in a zip lock bag with lime juice, salt/pepper, decent chili powder, red pepper flakes, cilantro and a little olive oil.  Let the fish marinate for a few hours.

The crema is just a little sour cream and lime juice.  A bed of greens on the bottom grilled corn tortillas, fish, fresh mango and topped with the crema (optional, of course). Use a little shredded cheese for texture. I also made a fresh salsa.  Simply tomatoes and onion, drizzle of olive oil, a little fresh garlic and cilantro, juice of one lime, salt and pepper to taste.  Stir.  Yummy.

Plate up, sit outside and enjoy the flowers. Music tonight was a shuffle of Rage Against the Machine. I’m stuck in that genre, and rather enjoying it.  Polvo showed up, as well.

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Father’s Day Dinner 

I went with my gut on this one, drawing from my Polish-Welsh American culinary roots and created…..grilled chicken gyros. 

  
I’m fascinated by the real thing, and just was jonesing for tzatziki. Had no mint, so used basil, heaped in cucumber and tomatoes and whipped that up. Basically, a refrigerator cleaning. A very yummy one at that. 

It is a Matter of Choice

Rick Williams PGA:

Jim over at The Grateful Golfer throws down some simple truth today.

Originally posted on The Grateful Golfer:

Choose to be Happy

I believe that being grateful and happy is a choice. For years I have changed the way I thought to help shape the life I want to live. Has it been easy, no, but definitely rewarding. Some days the light I see at the end of the tunnel feels like a train, but as I continue to shape my thoughts, my world changes shape as well! Every day is a better day.

Change your thoughts, change your world – Norman Vincent Peale

I also believe this mindset is transferable to golf. Golfing is a game of immense concentration for short periods of time. The rest of the time I spend enjoying my surroundings by soaking in its beauty, enjoying the company of my playing partners, or just being in the moment. All this has help me be a better golfer. I feel more relaxed, in control and just plain happy.

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Blackened Ahi Tuna – So Simple

Simple pleasure, simple meal.  

Blackened tuna in my cast iron skillet on a bed of greens with a mustard vinegarette. 

Blackening seasoning was just a pinch of brown sugar, cumin, coarse sea salt, cayenne, oregano, red chili powder, ground black pepper and fresh cilantro. I had a little olive oil and lime juice on the tuna with diced ginger and garlic. 

yum